DEAD DOLLS

sorrow

2011-06-07T18:43:00.002+08:00

He left me for the second time.

We did our best to save our r/s.

But it just won't work out.

So much of our sacrifices, but I believed God has a better plan for me.

I lost my friends, and now I lost him.

I'm better off dead rather than facing all this alone.

I love him, and I love my friends.

But I gotta accept the fact that someone whom I can't live without each day don't need me.

No matter what, they will still remain in my heart forever, I promise.

Dear God, please give me the strength to go through all this hardship and heart pains that they've caused.

Baobei

2011-05-22T23:48:00.002+08:00

Had a splendid time with Baobei last night.

Met him in the evening, and went to catch a movie.

Pirates Of The Caribbean.

I was the one who wanted to watch that badly.

But in the end, the movie turn out to be very boring.

I wanted to go off in the middle of the movie.

But Baobei managed to make me stay till the movie ends.

After movie, went to have our late dinner at Pizza Hut.

I ordered so much, but in the end, I didn't finished it up.

Baobei says I'm always not finishing up my food whenever I'm with him.

He said he don't wanna bring me to Seoul Garden; cause I've been wanting that.

He said it would be such a waste to bring me for a meal at a buffet restaurant.

My Baobei so cruel. Pfft !

After dinner, spent my night with Baobei till afternoon.

Had so much fun and laughter during that moment. LMAO !

Also met Sharifah for a while in the middle of midnight, haha!

In the afternoon, went for late breakfast / lunch at KFC.

Thought of going to the place Sharifah recommended, but couldn't find it.

After our meal, me and Baobei slack at around my area.

Went home almost in the evening, and we spend almost 24hours together.

And I shall admit, I'm already missing him badly now.

I wish he's there by my side every minutes and seconds of my life.

Can I marry him please? Hehk !

Next two weeks Baobei will be sent for reservist.

And it will be 1 week long.

I am still wondering how am I supposed to spent my week without him.

I'll be struggling and missing him like crazy for sure.

Friends? There's no such word in my dictionary.

Even if it exist, I'm sure it would have no meaning.

P.S: NO MATTER HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU NOW, I'M SORRY THAT I CAN'T LOVE YOU LIKE HOW I DID YESTERDAY.

baobei

2011-05-15T14:53:00.002+08:00

Went for a movie date with Baobei.

For the first time I decided to take pictures with him.

Its quite dark as this was around 2 am in the morning.

And ilovehim.

confuse

2011-05-05T20:51:00.002+08:00

I got nothing much to post actually.

But let me just say something.

Well, I'm on two days MC cause I've been having bad headache and a slight fever due to my swelling gums.

Ohs yes again, cause by the growing molar tooth.

Luckily my wisdom tooth does not hurt at the same time like how it used to.

I went to polyclinic to get an appointment for the dental, but guess what?!

The earliest appointment I can get is next year February!

How ridiculous is that?

But the antibiotic and painkiller that I got from doctor really works.

And I shall say I cancel the thoughts of going to private dentist.

Next, about this Saturday.

Supposed to have reunion with girls, but I can't make it.

Wait, its not a reunion, it's just going out together.

Yeah, that's what she said.

Well, I can't make it basically because I'm going USS with aunts and cousins all.

And yeah I'm super duper excited.

They make a last minute surprise for me, and yes I am surprised !

Aunt has already bought for me the ticket, and I can't probably reject her just like that right?

It's her treat, wee !~

Sorry girls, maybe next time.

OK, now I'm actually in the state of confusion between this two guys.

The one the second picture is the best for me, and yes I knew he's the one.

He admit that he still loves me and he wants me back.

And yeah we're back as per normal.

So, on the first picture here, is my beloved ex / boyfriend.

We're now in a complicated situation.

Yes I did make a decision to leave him.

But he's pulling me back and not letting me go.

And being weak, I keep falling for him.

I know I gotta make a wise decision.

complicated

2011-05-01T11:40:00.003+08:00

I gotta tell you guys something here !

My life is getting so complicated right now.

Shall I continue my story regarding my previous post?

Well, I did ask for some advice from friends and families.

And they said I should tell that guy that I'm already attached to someone else.

They even told me to bomblast him with questions to know what he's been hiding from me all this while.

And after all the bomblast, he finally admit that he still love me, and he wants me back.

I was speechless upon his reveals.

I mean, this time is for sure.

I could see the sincerity in him.

Then I realized, that everything he did to me all this while, he's trying to gain my trust back.

Yes, before I knew everything, my love for him totally fades.

But after knowing the truth, my heart sank, and I feel so touched.

I gotta tell him somehow that I'm already attached right?

Yeah, but my mistakes for not telling him.

It took me some time to realize that yes I do still love him.

Things got back to normal since then.

On the day that we finally solves everything, we met for late lunch.

I told him I was hungry, so he asked me out for lunch.

As per normal, he never fails to pamper me like a small kid.

Yes it feels a little awkward though.

But we act as if nothing had happen.

And that night, I was supposed to meet boyfriend.

But I did not told him about it.

I lied.

I told him I need to be home early.

Upon reaching home, I waited for boyfriend to text or calls me when he's awake.

But for the countless times, he ditched me again.

I was pissed.

All this while I've been sacrificing my time for him, but he never fails to ditch me.

The moment boyfriend text me, it's already almost 11 pm.

I was mad, and we quarreled.

I told him I was disappointed with his same old bloody attitude, and I gave up with him.

And yeah, that's my final words to him.

Wait ! Does that mean I'm off with him?

Am I ?? Haha I doubt so.

I told you my life is so complicated.

I keep running but I keep falling.

And now I gotta choose between two of them.

Shall I just leave my boyfriend instead?

Cause I realize he's nothing good compared to him.

*winks*

guilt

2011-04-29T18:41:00.002+08:00

I'm so in the guilt feeling.

The time has finally arrived.

This guy, who have stabbed me hard deep inside.

The most wonderful guy that ever came into my life.

Ever since he step in, my life seem so wonderful.

Never had the greatest feeling of all.

He may not have the looks that I want, but he has it all that I need.

From the first we knew each other, I never thought that he would mean so much to me.

I could still remember the vow that I made to my friends, which is never to meet him in person.

Cause he didn't reach to my expectations.

So each time he ask me out, I rejected.

He even want me to be his girlfriend.

But again I rejected.

But one day, he managed to put me into his trap to meet him.

After the meet up, I find myself so comfortable and happy being with him.

I feel more of being myself whenever I'm with him.

He treated me so much like how a little girl wanted a candy.

Being with him pampered me much.

And that's what every girl loves being treated.

It took us only 7 months, until one day he revealed everything.

He bring me to the most memorable place ever to let out everything.

Then I knew, I was not the only girl that he loves.

During our journey for 7 months, he's actually been waiting for his ex girlfriend.

But yes he loves me.

Just as a replacement.

I knew this gonna happen.

But never would I thought he would leave me this way.

He hopes that we could still be friends since then.

That moment, is the most dramatic moment I've ever encounter in life.

Just like every love movie you've watched;

Girl crying and leaving the guy and all the memories behind,

Guy chasing the girl from one end to the other,

Guy trying to stop the girl from leaving,

Quarreling out of no where, and so many more.

It took me quite some time to heal after that incident.

The wound that he'd cause for leaving me for another girl.

It really breaks my heart.

But not long after that, I manage to forgive himself.

And I felt appreciated for him to tell me the truth,

Rather than him lying to me all this while.

Thank you love.

There were also moments which I did fall back for him a couple of times.

But I manage to stood up, knowing that he would never want me back.

The only thing that make me move on, is to have the perception that I would never get the chance to be with him again.

I tried to move on with the memories we shared.

And yes that moment of time, I still love him, and I want no one else except him.

But finally, around this time, I manage to get over him, and I really mean it.

I manage to stop loving him.

And I manage to start hating him.

Hate?

How harsh can that word be.

This feeling came out of no where.

Days after days the feeling of getting sick and tired of him grows.

And I'm bored with him !

This strong feeling strikes me, and last night I finally stop contacting him after a small quarrel.

Today I did not contact him the whole day.

And he's been calling and messaging me the whole day.

Yes I left him with words unspoken, and I left him clueless.

Guilt; thats what I've been feeling the whole day.

I don't know if I should explain everything to him.

And I just don't have the guards to.

Ohs how coward can I be !

I don't even know if what I'm doing now is right.

I'm so much in a confused state right now.

My friends were shocked by my sudden change and decision.

Damn !

Am I just confused?

Or is this the right way for me to finally move on?

My friends said since I've got attached to my old brand new boyfriend, I neglect him.

Am I ?

I need help to all of my questions above !

P.S: I'm sorry loved.

reunion

2011-04-26T01:01:00.003+08:00

She planned to have a reunion between us girls.

But I don't know why I feel so down.

Shall I say I'm disappointed?

Till now I'm still wondering who's the hypocrite that tore us apart.

And what's his/her motive?

Doesn't they know how much my friends mean to me?

Why do these kinda humans still exist?

But wait, no matter what I did wrong, they shouldn't have abandon me right?

They should have told me what I did wrong right?

Why must they leave me?

Don't I mean anything to them?

Why must I keep crying over my broken and torn friendship?

I mean, if I mean something to them, this shouldn't have happen right?

Don't they even care what I'm going through and feeling right now?

Losing my friendship is like losing three-quarter of my life.

And I really mean it.

Don't they feel the same?

If they did, they should have ask how am I doing right?

Ohs wait, they should know that I'm not doing fine without them !

Shall I say I wanna apologize over whatever mistake that I've done be it I realize it or not?

Why don't I have the guards to say it straight to them?

Am I a coward?

Ohs yes I am !

Do they cry like how I did each night?

Don't they feel the lost like how I'm feeling right now?

Why can't we be like "N'Friqazee" ?

Always talk things out and solves every problem.

I am such a failure in every friendship ain't I?

P.S: I hope the upcoming reunion will solves everything.

mummy

2011-04-22T14:49:00.003+08:00

This is my mummy.

And I love her to the max.

Been staying at home with her ever since my friends left me.

And yes, they literally left me.

I don't know what I did wrong again.

But for sure they left me clueless.

Its true that forever never exist right?

They said these are not my real friends.

But why do they mean so much to me?

I'm such a failure in every friendship.

Sometimes I realize, we shouldn't be too nice to people.

They're just taking us for granted.

I've learnt not to trust anyone since then.

Bitch, I'm still waiting for you to reveal that you're the cause of the shits that happen between me and them !

P.S: I'm back to single ! It only lasted us for a couple of days !

mummy

2011-04-22T14:49:00.002+08:00

This is my mummy.

And I love her to the max.

Been staying at home with her ever since my friends left me.

And yes, they literally left me.

I don't know what I did wrong again.

But for sure they left me clueless.

Its true that forever never exist right?

They said these are not my real friends.

But why do they mean so much to me?

I'm such a failure in every friendship.

Sometimes I realize, we shouldn't be too nice to people.

They're just taking us for granted.

I've learnt not to trust anyone since then.

P.S: Bitch, I'm still waiting for you to reveal that you're the cause of the shits that happen between me and them !

boyfriend

2011-04-14T23:10:00.003+08:00

Meet my dearly new boyfriend.

The same old brand new him.

Its been years we've been apart, and now we're back together.

I surely do miss him.

I hope I'm not taking him as a rebound.

But, am I really ready for someone new?

Am I ready for the commitment?

Fcuk it, I still love him though.

14-April-2011

Winks.

Supposed to meet him today.

But I was too tired.

Told him to take OT instead.

Tomorrow and Saturday meeting him.

I so can't wait for the moment.

Gonna hug bf tight2 and kiss him all over, haha!

Wait, didn't I have plan tomorrow??

Ohs dammit !

Who should I ditch this time? -.-

school time!

2011-04-11T08:07:00.002+08:00

Finally it's Monday!

It's time for school after 1 month of break.

I can't wait to meet the beauties especially Athirah & Sharifah.

I can't wait to see all the newbies, especially my lovely cousin in school today.

Good luck cuzzy !

I know this is so not me.

This is what people say " semangat dua minit "

Hehk !

friends

2011-04-07T00:46:00.002+08:00

I miss my baby girls so damn freaking much.

I don't know why I feel so drifted away from them.

How sad it is that they don't answer my calls and replied to any of my messages.

They don't even wanna meet me.

And how heartbreaking to know that they met each other without me.

When perhaps I did ask them out.

They were busy and didn't replied my message respectively.

I feel so isolated.

I'm so sad,

And I miss them truck loads.

Tomorrow going for karaoke with them.

And I hope whatever I'm feeling right now, I am just being paranoid.

Dear God, never make us fall apart like how my greatest friendship gets apart last time.

They mean the world,

And without them, I'm feeling at worst.

I'm not willing for another failure in friendship.

Someone, please define what's F-R-I-E-N-D-S.

missing her

2011-04-06T00:47:00.002+08:00

I miss them truck loads.

Feel so lonely without them tonight,

especially Amalina.

Damn, I realised I shouldn't have went home today.

Should have sleep at her cribs for another night or something?

Damn, damn, damn.

Can I cry?

Boohooo!

My baby Aqilah

My bestest cousin, Amalina. I love her to the core!

baby shower

2011-04-04T18:03:00.006+08:00

Baby Shower at aunt's place yesterday.

So much fun, and I did enjoyed myself,

Although the weather has been really bad.

The night before, love fetch me for dinner; Pizza Hut.

Had so much fun, but I could sense something's not right.

Is he up for something?

Its better to have doubts than putting too much hope.

Tomorrow love fetching me home from cousin's place,

And we going for dinner again I supposed?

I can't wait to go home and meet my lovely ladies.

I think we've been somehow apart after my busy week.

Or am I just being paranoid?

I hope I am.

Baby Nurizzayani :)

Sister, Me and bestest cousin; Amalina :)

cookie

2011-04-02T18:46:00.002+08:00

Baking session with cousin at her cribs. This is my first try baking cookie. Chocolate chip cookies. *smile* In an hour time will be meeting love. Off to have our dinner. Love, please fetch me asap. Wait, did I said dinner? Damn, I make a mistake by having dinner at cousin's cribs. Love gonna scold me for that, tskk !

johor trip

2011-04-01T23:43:00.002+08:00

One day trip to Malaysia; Johor with Suzianti.

Went for a little shopping, and managed to capture only two pictures.

Too much to say and remember;

the early arrival at Pandan City,

the "Osman" restaurant,

the super duper hot and humid weather,

the moment when a guy peek-a-boo at Suzi,

the moment we had a bad headache due to the heat,

the moment we slack at the coffee bean,

the moment that bus driver pester for MYR0.20, but Suzi gave him S$0.20 and force him to take.

the moment we walked around the Pandan City for countless times,

the moment I tore my pants,

the most amazing taxi driver who let us smoke and threw our ashes in his cab,

and last but not least, the moment we got lost on our back to the checkpoint.

My first short trip with friends.

Promised to go again and shop for more.

But this time, with all my girlfriends please?

I'm so missing them badly; especially Nurul.

Sobs sobs

grades

2011-03-31T11:38:00.004+08:00

I just received my results for the final semester for my first year in BSM.

May not be satisfying, but I improved.

From 1.667 to 2.000.

You may be saying, "what?! only 2.000?"

Yes, I didn't put much effort though.

If I've put in more effort, I'm sure it would be paid off.

And I'm all thanks to my teachers for pushing me all the way.

May be disappointing, but I'm a lot happier to see my improvement.

And I did pass all !

*winks*

Last semester grades

Final semester for first year grades

back

2011-03-31T01:23:00.003+08:00

I'm back with my new blog skin!

back :)

2011-03-08T01:12:00.003+08:00

Its been decades since the last post.

you must be missing lots and lots of stories about Nuraudha and her life.

too many happens, but one thing for sure, she's officially apart from her baby.

too much things to say, you should have just look at her dramatic life.

karma has been striking her non-stop.

poor girl, how unlucky, and it's sucks to be her, trust me.

her love life ends just like that after she got apart from baby.

can I not call him baby anymore?

can I just call him stupid instead?

yes, because of his stupidity, he left her.

to make it worst, for someone who is not willing to love him as much as she love him.

no matter what happens, that stupid guy seems to be so special to her still.

she will never forget him, and no matter how many years would pass, she's willing to welcome him back anytime.

told you he's so special to her.

although they were still keeping in touch, they admit that they couldn't get any better like before.

this has totally messed up their life.

but one thing for sure, they're moving on strong.

how heartbreaking can this be.

pfft !

next !~

today she will be having her last final theory exam for the first year.

and obviously she gonna enjoy herself to the max.

but isn't she been enjoying with her life all this while ? haha !

she can't wait to end her first year in the school, and to graduate asap.

amazingly, she completed all her assignments and projects.

well done girl !

may you succeed in the future :)

next !~

wait ! can I just stop here?

I'm tired of typing.

shall I just continue next time?

thank you, ily people !

P.S: FATE TEAR US APART.

Happy valentines day !

2011-02-14T00:01:00.003+08:00

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY TO EVERYONE OUT THERE.

BE IT YOU HAVE A VALENTINE OR NOT.

ENJOY, HAVE A GOOD DAY AHEAD.

P.S: HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY MY DEAREST.

The price of being stupid.

2011-02-09T03:18:00.003+08:00

P.S: After so much of sacrifice, u left me speechless.

The truth hurts, but I knew it from the very start, I can sense it coming.

Love, laughters, tears and hatred that got us all this while is just worthless.

I shall not call this a lesson or karma, cause it wasn't me.

They said you were stupid, they called u a jerk, and we're all wrong about u.

U love her, u love me, but u choose her when perhaps she don't even exist in your life anymore.

U were stupid, and u were unappreciative.

U flush it all away, and left me broken with only memories.

I'm down, and now I'm into pieces.

How hurt it is to see someone you love leave you for the one they love.

The price of being stupid.

I hope karma strikes you one day.

the worst.

2011-02-07T23:53:00.002+08:00

Tomorrow gonna be the day that gonna change Nuraudha and her life.

its all in her hand to consider about it after which.

be it for good, or otherwise.

all she has to do now, is to be prepared for the worst.

she is too weak now.

may god gives her the strength to go through all these pain.

and may everything goes perfectly right tomorrow night.

P.S: I can't bare loosing you.

promised.

2011-01-27T01:21:00.002+08:00

She loose him once, and she couldn't afford to loose him for the second time.

P.S: I PROMISED.

back.

2011-01-23T19:47:00.004+08:00

I miss this guy over here, and I'll always love him.

P.S: BABY, I GIVE UP !

happy new year

2011-01-02T00:01:00.004+08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL READERS.

MAY THIS YEAR BE A GOOD AND BETTER YEAR FOR YOU INDEED.

MAY U BE BLESSED WITH HEALTH AND WEALTH.

MAY HAPPINESS COME YOUR WAY.

HOPE YOU HAD A GREAT START JUST NOW.

MUCH MUCH LOVE FROM ME TO YOU.

P.S: WHY DOES IT HURT TO MISS SOMEONE?

happy birthday baby ♥

2010-12-25T02:18:00.003+08:00

From: Nuraudha

happy birthday to my one and only baby love.

glad that you're born this date so that I could have the chance to meet such a nice baby boy like you.

you seems so perfect in my eyes.

you came and be part of my life and soul.

I don't know where would I stand now without you by my side.

thanks for the love and care that you've showered me throughout the months that I've known you.

sorry for those tears that I've caused.

sorry for everything that I've done that ever make you feel down.

thank you so much for your patience and guidance.

you're the best man I've ever had.

you're the sunshine, you're the light and you're the rainbow in my life.

I appreciate the moments of laughter and tears with you.

may it last forever even if we wouldn't have the chance to be together.

may your wishes become a dream come true.

may god bless you and your family with both health and wealth.

may you have a long happy life ahead.

may you have a blast today, its your day baby !

hopes u love the advance birthday celebration and gifts.

much much love from me to you.

missing you as always and forever.

muahcks.

P.S: ♥DARWIN♥

birthday celebration

2010-12-24T22:13:00.002+08:00

the birthday celebration was great.

Nurul and herself rushed to get them a birthday cake, and off to Grandlink Square for karaoke.

baby and his friend were late due to some reasons.

reached at about 10.20 pm, and the karaoke session ended at 12.20am.

thought of cutting the cake that moment, but something got cocked up.

after karaoke, off they went to Changi Village to eat.

and again, they did not cut the cake there.

these girls were actually confused of how the plan would go about.

baby and his friend keep asking what's inside the big plastic bag, which is the cake.

but these girls tries to get these guys attention off from the cake.

its a surprise you see !

after their supper, they went to Changi Beach to slack.

there, these girls decided to cut the cake.

baby and his friend were shocked and embarrassed.

after cutting the cake, she decided to give baby his present.

baby decided to open it on the spot.

baby thank Nurul and her for everything.

he even scolded her for buying him such an expensive gifts.

smile.

slack, slack, slack, till they could even fall asleep !

how tiring can it be that night !

poor these guys as they had to work that morning, so they decided to go home.

and it also started to rain if I'm not wrong ?

and, that's all for that night?

I am sure that these girls really had a superb, awesome, and fantastic night !

P.S: I NEED ONLY YOU.

Zirca

2010-12-23T19:00:00.002+08:00

she had a freaking awesome night last night.

enjoying with all her girlfriends.

party party party !

reached back to Nurul's cribs at around 5.30 am.

sleep sleep sleep till afternoon.

now she's home.

but going off again to celebrate baby and his friend's birthday.

yeah they finally agree.

but these girls don't know whether they should be excited or prepared for the worst.

plus, she's wondering how to give baby's present later.

wondering what should she say to baby upon giving the present.

stress !!

may everything goes on smoothly and great.

have a wonderful night girls !

P.S: THE REST OF MY LIFE.

down the drain.

2010-12-22T00:12:00.003+08:00

She's feeling so disappointed with baby right now.

Nurul and herself have been planning to do a small celebration for baby and his friend's birthday.

they cracked their brain each day, planning to do a little surprised for them.

but all their efforts and thoughts went down the drain.

baby and his friend look totally not interested for the outing that these girls have planned.

how disappointing can it be?

each time these girls asked about the plan, these guys would came out with lots and lots of excuses.

don't you think that these guys are not interested?

well, at least somehow these guys should appreciate their thoughts for them.

sadded.

when she told baby that the plan should be cancelled since they're not interested, baby seems care-less.

see, told you its pointless and meaningless !

how cruel can they be?!

what's in her mind now ?

- to came down to baby's place on his birthday just to pass him the present which she had already bought for him just now; Pierre Cardin wallet.

- and maybe she should go home straight after that, not staying with baby, to at least somehow show baby how disappointed she is with him. how about that?

confused.

P.S: UNAPPRECIATED.

say hello to her past.

2010-12-21T02:32:00.003+08:00

its been some time since I last post.

so I decided to give a short post.

you must have missed a lot about Nuraudha and her life.

but overall, she's doing fine and great.

baby and herself is doing good.

four more days to baby's birthday.

today she's buying him his birthday present.

nothing much, just a wallet from Pierre Cardin.

smile.

she can't wait for Wednesday night to enjoy with her baby girls.

and not forgetting Thursday night too.

hope everything happens, and went on smoothly.

may she have fun on both days.

P.S: HELLO PAST.

she's giving up.

2010-12-15T14:07:00.002+08:00

sick and tired of her life.

more and more obstacles keeps chasing after her.

few days back she quarreled with her baby again.

but this time its worst.

her friends said she was being too ego.

but she believed she's just fanning her emotions.

but things got better that night as baby came down to meet her.

they talked things out and soon it was o.k.

but a couple days later, things happen again.

but this time its not quarreling.

its just that she decided to give up with baby and stop waiting.

the strongest feeling she had that moment is the urge to look back at the past and be back with it.

its not that she can't move on, but she just want to stay the way it was like in the past.

she even argued with her babygirls about this.

they knew baby was the one.

but you can't blame her if one day she's gonna give up.

she's just too weak to go through all this, so you people should understand.

doesn't mean that guy is good enough or perfect for her, she gonna have a happy life with him, am I right ?

so, like what I said, she's giving up soon.

sorry to those who are affected by the sudden change.

she's still in the state of confusion whether to come back to her past, or stay with baby, or move on AGAIN for the billions of time.

may she makes the right choice.

P.S: MAYBE WE AIN'T TO BE TOGETHER.

her B love.

2010-12-12T00:14:00.004+08:00

back with the next post.

well, things got better now for her.

her buddy has been away to KL for some time.

so this is the time when she had to be independent and go to school by herself.

and she hates that the most.

without her buddy in school, she felt so left out.

as you know, she's not the friendly type of person, or someone whom will mixed around easily.

perhaps somehow her classmates thinks that she and her buddy is the worst people in the class due to our poor attendance and attitude.

but who cares, she don't have to think what people said about her.

not forgetting, thanks to her baby for always fetching her from school each day without missed.

much appreciated.

smile.

her babygirl Nurul has finally come back to her once more.

she swears she hates the feeling of loosing Nurul.

but as was mentioned, things got better now.

about her status with baby, they're still in the process of being together.

waiting for the right moment though.

that's all for now.

she's missing her best buddy and baby badly now.

may her buddy comes home fast and safely.

and may baby feels the same way as she is right now.

sobs sobs.

P.S: CAN YOU GIVE ME A LITTLE MORE OF YOUR TIME PLS?

these tears.

2010-12-09T00:51:00.003+08:00

she's controlling her tears badly.

wondering why do things happen at the same time.

maybe she's just fanning her emotions ?

too many things happen to her in just a couple of days.

things got different, and everything change.

part of her soul is flowing away.

why does this always happen ?

why must a start always have an end ?

why must tears came after every smile ?

sobs.

where's the rainbow after the rain ?

P.S: ARE YOU READY FOR COMMITMENT ?

hang over.

2010-12-06T11:22:00.003+08:00

last night she went to Changi Village with babygirl Nurul and Zahira.

finally she gets what she's craving for, which is the Mee TomYam.

unexpected, baby and his friend came.

SURPRISE !!!

these girls were so shocked as they didn't expect them to come down.

baby said it was his friend who wanted to come down and meet them.

due to an unexpected and random meet ups, these guys did not bring their extra helmet to send them home.

Zahira felt left out, so she decided to bring one of her guy friend.

winks.

baby and his friend went home around 11 +.

about an hour later, Zahira and her guy friend went home, left with Nurul and her.

that was the greatest moments of the day.

they had their best conversation.

tears drip from her eyes every minutes.

too many in her mind and a combination of a mixed feelings.

enough of sharing, they headed home at around 1 + am.

during one of their conversations, she feels touched and glad for Nurul's support regarding her status with baby.

Nurul is really expecting her to stick to one this time as she knows, baby is the right one for her.

may god bless Nurul, for always helping and giving support to her.

P.S: WHEN MY HEART STARTS TO SPEAK.

last night.

2010-12-05T12:41:00.004+08:00

she just reached home from meeting her baby.

for sure she had a bombastic-awesome-great-wonderful night last night.

she wish it would be stay like that forever.

smile.

she's missing him already.

her weekends gonna be busy due to work starting next week.

but she hopes that would not pull her away from being with her baby and babygirl Nurul.

she's happy for her babygirl Nurul after hearing the biggest news !

may this be their stepping stone to the next stage.

she hopes Nurul continues being patience and do not give up.

she's looking forward to baby and her baby's friend birthday which is coming soon.

she already got something in my mind for her baby.

winks.

P.S: BABY YOU'RE GREAT LAST NIGHT.

date.

2010-12-04T15:12:00.003+08:00

weekends has finally arrive.
the day she's been waiting for.
spending time as much as possible with her baby.
she's doing all she can to make today really happens.
she shall expect too much for tonight.
may tonight not be a disappointing night.

P.S: I WANT MORE.

double date

2010-12-02T15:22:00.003+08:00

been some time did not post due to busyness.

well, obviously she's been enjoying her life to the fullest.

yesterday she went for a double date with baby, babygirl Nurul and baby's friend.

they've planned to go for karaoke at Grandlink.

to these girls surprise, these guys came and fetched them with bikes.

SEXcited !

for the first time she's not embarrassed to sing in front of guys, especially her love ones.

being with her baby, makes her feel more of herself.

after karaoke, they went to Labrador Park to hang out.

too many sweet little things happen there.

and for sure these girls really had so much fun.

the best double date ever.

they're hoping to have a great outing again like yesterday.

but one thing for sure, she's really hoping for these Saturday to happen.

dating with baby !

but she would always keep in mind, expect the least expectations.

smile.

P.S: I WANT YOU FOREVER.

her great achievement.

2010-11-27T02:37:00.003+08:00

she has made a great achievement.

coming to school on Friday morning from 8 am to 1 pm.

of course she feels proud of it.

supposed to went home at 12 am, but Sharifah and herself were to stay back for 'counselling'.

had their lunch in school.

went home and have a long nap.

then off she went to Bedok to meet Nurul, Sharifah and her friends.

didn't have the chance to meet her baby.

but they're hoping to meet baby and baby's friend again tonight!

tomorrow she's going for breakfast with Suzi.

she's feeling so lethargic.

let's hope she can wake up this morning.

P.S: I'M TIRED OF WAITING.

missing babies.

2010-11-25T21:31:00.002+08:00

she's missing her baby and babygirl Nurul.

one day of not meeting is such a bore.

today she rottens at home.

not really.

after school, she had a short nap.

and off to hospital again.

Nurul and herself has decided to stay at home tonight.

hopes tomorrow would be a better day.

P.S: WHEN THINGS DOESN'T SEEM RIGHT.

his tears.

2010-11-24T10:00:00.002+08:00

she's been lazy to post these days.

busy with her outside night life with her love ones.

too many things happen.

but one thing for sure that she could not forget, is making her baby cry yesterday.

were slacking with babygirl Nurul, baby, and baby's friend.

when baby started to joke around, ego strikes her.

she treated baby so bad.

baby tried to coax her, but she ignored.

baby felt so bad and guilty, thinking that he had somehow hurt her.

out of no where, baby's tears keep dripping.

he tried to cover his tears by wiping.

but too bad, she saw it.

when baby's friend ask whether he's crying, he soon walked off.

she gets so panicked and shocked, not knowing what to do.

carrying the huge guilt in herself, she apologize to baby and coax him.

she almost cried seeing baby crying when she was coax-ing him.

but thank god, things were fine.

baby forgive me for making him cry.

how nice can that be.

and, that's the second time baby shed for her.

as soon as things get better, we went for a ride.

she's not familiar with the places, but for sure its a nice place though.

everyone did not wanted to go home, but baby was too tired.

so they all went home at 3 am.

i end my story for yesterday.

and not forgetting to share, teacher been complaining to her dad that her attendance is bad, and she keeps wearing slipper to school.

she also complain to her dad that she often come school late.

she suggested to give her dad a copy of her school's timetable.

how sucks can that be ?

P.S: IF I COULD COUNT THOSE TEARS YOU SHED.

her priority.

2010-11-21T15:13:00.002+08:00

yesterday she did a little shopping with babygirl Nurul.

then off she went to meet her baby.

baby was so excited to meet her.

went home late midnight, at almost 3 am.

she would like to apologize to those affected.

but to make it clear, her weekends are meant for her baby only.

so for those who are busy with their school life on weekdays, then perhaps you should wait long long to meet her.

it's not that her friends ain't important to her anymore.

but she gets sick and tired of prioritizing people who don't prioritize her.

so now she's starting to prioritize her baby since her baby prioritize her so much.

this is not a way of revenge or somewhat.

much appreciated if you could understand her.

smile.

soon she's meeting Nurul again.

they're hoping to meet baby and baby's friend.

hopes today gonna be a reality.

P.S: I AIN'T NEED YOU.

she's stupid.

2010-11-19T23:34:00.002+08:00

again, she didn't went to school today.

as usual, every morning she would quarrel with Sharifah for small matter.

met Nurul in the morning, and watched her sleep.

like real !

infact she fell asleep too.

went home in the afternoon, and followed her parents to CGH to visit her aunt.

at night, met Nurul again to slack.

today she went home much much earlier, as her aunt is sleeping over her place.

so she has to show a little good example.

smile.

tomorrow is the day.

she's hoping to meet Nurul and her baby again !

not forgetting baby's friend.

hope tomorrow becomes reality.

smile.

well, she's actually missing someone right now.

and she did the most stupid thing on earth that a girl would do.

but don't blame her.

she's just in a confused state.

may she makes the right choice.

P.S: BE MINE.

she don't need a friend like you.

2010-11-19T03:35:00.002+08:00

don't leave if you know you can't live without her.

by the time you come back, don't be surprised if she can live her life to the fullest without you.

you came only when you need and miss her.

you took her for granted,

and you make her waited for no reason.

she hates the way you treated her.

if you think you can live without her, then trust me, she can do it much better than you !

in fact I should say, she don't need you in her life anymore.

she got all she needs now.

she don't need a friend like you.

don't call yourself a friend if this is how you treated her.

go ahead with your busy life, and don't come back searching for her.

she's so disappointed with you.

true friends isn't about how long you know her, its about who comes and never leaves.

P.S: LEAVE AND NEVER COME BACK !

she needs freedom.

2010-11-18T16:37:00.002+08:00

as soon as she reached home from school, her mom started nagging.
about her handphone bills, the warning letter, going out each day till late midnights and many more.
she hate naggers.
she got so pissed off that she didn't even response to what her mom is talking.
can everybody out there stop being a busybody?
she knows what she's doing.
she don't need anybody to tell her what to do.
she don't need your advice, she don't need your nag, and she don't need anybody to discipline her.
so start minding your own business.

P.S: I NEED FREEDOM.

her first warning letter.

2010-11-18T12:24:00.003+08:00

last night she met her baby.
thought that he would only come down just to pass her the money.
but turn out that he wanted to pass her, her favourite dish which his mom has cooked for hari raya.
she was so touched for his kind thoughts for coming down to her place just to pass the dish and money.
its been 3 days straight she's been meeting her baby.
she's hoping to be by her baby's side every minutes and every seconds.
smile.
she's now in school at IT Lab.
she's supposed to do her assignments, but yet she's here to post.
not forgetting, she recieved her first warning letter from school for her poor attendance.
her dad has been nagging since morning.
how bad is that.
but she wonders, when will she recieve the third warning letter?
so that she would be out of the school asap.
winks!

P.S: YOU'RE AS SWEET AS SUGAR.

hari raya haji.

2010-11-17T23:43:00.003+08:00

she would like to wish selamat hari raya haji to all muslims.

wishing the people at the haji is safe.

today, she went to her aunt house for celebrating hari raya haji.

last night, she met Nurul and her baby.

unfortunately baby's friend couldn't make it.

we slack till daylight.

and now, she has to meet her baby again to take her money from him.

hope tonight baby won't bring her out again till late midnight or early morning as she has to go to school tomorrow !

let's hope Sharifah and herself can woke up early in the morning to school tomorrow.

P.S: THINK BEFORE YOU TALK.

bad Monday morning.

2010-11-16T02:43:00.002+08:00

last two days, she stayed at home rottening.

she spent the whole day sleeping.

supposed to meet her baby, but the weather makes her feel so lethargic.

this Monday morning started of badly.

first she quarreled with her sister.

then she quarreled with Sharifah.

so many little things happen on Monday morning.

but amazingly, her baby fetch her from school.

and obviously it brightens her day.

in the evening, she met her baby girls and slack near her area.

late night, baby decided to meet her.

so he fetched her and they went off.

Nurul and herself hoping to meet baby and baby's friend tonight.

cause the next day is public holiday !

hell yeah Wednesday is Hari Raya.

Selamat Hari Raya Haji to all muslims.

P.S: CALL IT LOVE.

her night life.

2010-11-14T03:26:00.002+08:00

she enjoyed herself last night meeting her baby, nurul, and baby's friend.
everyone's expecting to stay till day time, but unfortunately baby's friend was tired.
they went home at around 5.30am.
she followed Nurul home and slept at her house till late evening.
at night she met Sharifah and Nurul.
Nurul and herself is expecting to meet baby and baby's friend, but unfortunately baby was already sound asleep.
so they just hang out by themselves till midnight.
Nurul and herself went home at around 1.40 am.
amazing and surprisingly they walked from Bedok North to their hometown.
they find it very creepy, but they are very proud of their great achievement.
*thumbs up* for both of them.
along their way home, there happens the most humiliating incident.
the most humiliating thing that Nurul ever did.
they laughed all they way home happily.
and now they are safely home and going off to bed.
and so, this is Nuraudha's kind of night life.
always spending her nights outside with her love ones.
may every moment of her life be surrounded by her love ones.

P.S: EXPECT THE LEAST EXPECTED.

she's meeting amalina today.

2010-11-12T11:35:00.002+08:00

again she didn't went to school.
her parents was so worried if she would be kicked out of the school.
her parents been trying to persuade her to continue studying.
may she knows what's best for her and make a good decision.
she's going out with her beloved cousin today; nur amalina.
she's going to enjoy herself all day long !
she may be meeting her lovely girlfriend; nurul tonight.
*smile*

P.S: I WANT THE WHOLE WORLD TO KNOW !

she watched him sleep all night.

2010-11-12T02:55:00.003+08:00

she has just reached home from meeting her baby.
at first she didn't talked much as the ego is still there.
but soon he makes her feels so much better.
they had so much fun together.
she's already missing him now.
*smile*
he was so tired till he fall asleep in her arms.
she watched him sleep till tears dripping all the way.
thinking how bad her ego was last night.
thinking how harsh she has treated him.
and thinking how much she love him, and not wanting to lose him.
everything seems so perfect when you are with your love ones.
not forgetting, love is still in her mind.
she's trying her best to forget about love and move on with her new baby.
may she move on with the right person.
let's hope that she gonna stick to one this time!

P.S: IM NOT PERFECT, BUT I KEEP TRYING.

it's all in her hand.

2010-11-11T19:10:00.003+08:00

meeting her baby to talk things out later.

she's hoping everything would go fine.

she knew she has to stop fanning her ego and make things right.

may everything goes smoothly.

P.S: I AM SORRY.

her first tears for baby.

2010-11-11T10:13:00.003+08:00

she quarreled with her baby last night.

and for the first time she shed her tears for him.

her conversation with Nurul also has make her cry.

last night was a tearful night.

should she leave her past and continue moving forward?

should she turn back and never looking forward again?

or should she just leave her past and present, and look forward for the future?

let her decides her own happiness.

may god bless her always.

P.S: I MAY BE DUMB BUT I'M NOT STUPID.

she's having insomnia.

2010-11-10T03:04:00.004+08:00

insomnia strikes her tonight.

she's wondering whether she should go to school this morning.

she will be having two test this morning, which is NAT and WFB.

help her choose one option:

1) go for MTY practical lesson from 11 am to 1 pm

2) go for both test and skipped MTY practical lesson

3) go for both test and practical lessons from 8 am to 1 pm

4) absence for the day

P.S: BABY STOP RUNNING, IM TIRED OF CHASING.

she is disappointed.

2010-11-09T21:48:00.003+08:00

she's supposed to meet her baby, nurul, and her baby's friend tonight.
but everything seems to get cock up.
nurul and her is really upset and disappointed.
but nurul and her is staying strong.
they are hoping to meet up really really soon.
she really miss her baby so much.
and guess what's in her mind right now?!

P.S: CAN I LIKE NOT GO TO SCHOOL PLS?

grant her wishes anyone?

2010-11-09T18:58:00.004+08:00

she has just top up for herself and her baby.
she was hoping things could get better this time.
but again, paranoid strikes her.
too many little things is playing in her mind.
can someone please grant her wishes???
get her out of schooling life,
finds herself a job,
make her life surrounded by her love ones,
and live happily ever after.

P.S: I WANNA MEET MY BABY PRETTY SOON PLS?

she's missing her babylove.

2010-11-09T13:21:00.005+08:00

again, she skipped school today.

was feeling so lazy, that even her parents has given up with her.

she's off to hospital again for visiting.

she's sick and tired of rottening at home.

she's hoping for her love ones to ask her out today.

she's not in good terms with her baby,

so she decided to call her love just to hear his voice.

she called using private number, and as soon as his voice was out, she hang the phone.

hearing his voice for a second is great enough to brighten her day.

she's now in the state of missing her babylove.

*winks*

P.S: CONFUSED.

school

2010-11-09T00:27:00.002+08:00

school was sucks today.

i mean everyday.

was super late for our lesson, and Miss Tay had really given up with us.

my lovely teacher Miss Lim scolded us for not handing up our work.

I'm lazy, tired, don't understand the question, and get really sick and tired of school.

we were supposed to stay back till we finish up our work, but we ran out of the class.

and I really mean ran !

fyi, I've actually planned to quit school.

I've talked to my teacher, and also my parents.

unfortunately I wasn't allowed to.

I was forced to continue my studies to at least get a cert in this course.

I had really lost the interest.

so you'll know how these people who have given up acts right ?

hell yeah, I skipped school, I was late, I skipped class and many more.

I don't care what people gonna say, I'm with my decision.

I continued because I was forced to.

skipped my practical lesson just now and went to hospital to visit my aunt.

went home and met my baby girls.

thought of meeting love, but he was busy.

well, he change.

i change for the better, but he change for the worst.

i hate changes.

get back to you soon !~

P.S: THINGS GOTTEN WORST.

♥ welcome back ♥

2010-11-08T00:10:00.002+08:00

hello suckers.

I'm back for blogging.

been away for so long.

well, I've edit my skins.

it may look boring, but I'm just making it simple.

i shall be back posting in any minute.

P.S: I MISS YOU LIKE CRAZY.

happy birthday to me ! ♥

2010-10-08T00:43:00.002+08:00

WANT

HIM

FOR

BIRTHDAY

PLEAAASSSEEEE ?

eight ♥

2010-09-29T23:20:00.004+08:00

i realised its been 9 days since i last posted.

i stop posting cause my font has change.

i tried to get it back to normal font and color, but its just not working.

so somehow i am so pissed and disappointed that i decided not to post.

pfft.

im sure u guys missed many parts of my life stories.

well, life is going on sucks.

holiday is such a bore for me !

friends are all busy working.

love and dearest too.

but at least somehow dearest frequently would come down to my block just to see me.

sometimes it happens every day.

loves for him grew stronger as i could see him coming back.

but as soon as he left, love fades.

love is missing me badly.

but as soon the time comes, i shall leave, and im sorry.

i knew i have been saying this many times.

but took a second, and think; how could i even leave someone so perfect like him?

only the spaces between us lead me do so.

sobs sobs. heEs!~

anyways, i bought new handphone, Blackberry Curve.

planning to buy Nokia E5 but ended up with Blackberry instead. haha

don't really care, as long as i have new phone.

no longer my old nokia phone. hehe

bubye old phone, thank you for being so useful to me.

you will always be in my drawer.

*winks*

hey people, i supposed u dont remember.

we're left with 8 more days to my birthday. heEs!~

my plan for having a chalet during my birthday is not happening.

and i am really sorry about that as i got too much to settle with $$$.

maybe next time then.

well, not planning to celebrate my birthday this year.

no mood to celebrate it since the chalet is not happening.

somehow i really wish i could celebrate my birthday with dearest.

just like how we surprised Suzi during her birthday this year.

damn, that would be a great great birthday surprise for me. haha

i wish.

let's countdown together people !

8 more days, we gonna party all night long ! haha

-.-

school will be reopening on 11 October.

am so not ready.

dearest has been so naggy cause i've been so lazy during my holidays at home.

he said i should find jobs instead, haha.

at least somehow me being at home, u can meet me everyday like how u did everyday after your work !

so stop being naggy baby.

P.S: SORRY FOR THE UGLY FONT AND COLOR.

friendship day ♥

2010-09-15T20:02:00.003+08:00

TO MY DEAR FRIEND; NURAIN AYU SUZIANTI BTE HUSSIN.

The meaning of true friendship
is simple to explain
it's when a friend is with you
in laughter, love and pain.

Always there to lend a hand
no matter what you do
but most of all always there
to love and comfort you.

We shared in many laughters
we cried so many tears
it felt like i had know you
throughout my living years.

Yet our time we had together
was cut short for reasons why
as no-one can explain just how
you left and made me cry.

You'll always be a part of me
within my heart you'll stay
Is you I'm always think of
each night and everyday.

I wish i only had the chance
to see you just once more
to tell you friend i love you
like I should have done before!

P.S: HAPPY 10 YEARS OF FRIENDSHIP !

theory test ♥

2010-09-12T22:58:00.003+08:00

hello readers !

been busy with hari raya these days.

busy collecting money, hehe!

still wondering whether i should use my hangbao to buy new phone, or pay my bills, go for shopping, or plan something for my birthday.

any suggestions ???

tsk ! tsk !

tomorrow's my final theory paper test.

never studied as u knew.

too lazy to bring back my thick fat book which is now peacefully in my locker.

no matter how sucks i gonna do for tomorrows paper, i gonna give it a shot and end it as soon as the clock strike 1 pm !

then, 1 month of holiday for me, wohooooo !~

i miss dearest.

and not forgetting, i contacted back with my ex, which was once a jerk to me.

*winks*

love is at kampung.

he will back tomorrow.

not looking forward, sorry.

:):)

P.S: TAKING BACK MY LOVE.

hari raya ! ~ ♥

2010-09-10T01:24:00.003+08:00

SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILFITRI TO ALL MUSLIMS.
FORGIVE MY WRONGDOINGS BE IT INTENTIONALLY OR NOT.
MAY WE FORGIVE AND FORGET.
HAVE FUN EATING !~

ok people.
just came back from geylang with lovely friends.
swear it was so packed.
did my henna finally !
and one thing that make my day today, the first day of raya, is seeing my beloved ex !
omg i swear i am super happy.
he asked me how am i doing and stuff.
but sad thing is, when he was taking out his phone, wanna ask for my new number, we had to go on our separate ways.
damn !
i miss that freaking big chance !
nehvermind.
there's always a next time, hehe !
and so, today is hari raya.
not in the mood of celebrating still.
still sick, boohoo!
i just cant wait to eat, wear my new clothes, and collect $$$ !!

P.S: I WANT YOU BACK !

chiffon beige ♥

2010-09-08T22:17:00.004+08:00

hello readers.

sorry to say, but once i started posting, i cant stop posting.

but once i stop posting, it'll be hard to start posting again. haha

today is such a long day in school.

unfortunately, i woke up late, and attend school at 12pm.

school starts at 8 am actually ! haha

had our HFT practical test which took us from 2 pm to about 5.30 pm.

supposed to end at 4pm today, but teachers drag us till late afternoon.

dearest was suppose to fetch me today from school.

but unfortunately, his work was drag till late evening.

its alright, maybe next time.

*winks*

anyway, i admit i didnt did great or awesome for my test.

maybe bad ? or maybe just o.k ? haha

hopefully to pass.

tomorrow is our oral test for HFT.

and thats my weak-est point.

pfft.

i knew i couldnt do well for tomorrow.

but atleast i would try my very best.

*winks*

anyway, i dont know why just now i suddenly fell sick in school.

keep on coughing non-stop and that's sucks.

Sharifah says Athirah pass me the germs ! hahaha

dear throat, please get well as soon as possible, by tomorrow evening. hehe

cant wait to go geylang tomorrow evening with my lovely bitches !~

gonna do henna, woohooo ~

anyone wanna join us ?

or perhaps if u urself going to geylang, then lets hope we'll meet there.

*winks*

anyway, i dyed my hair; chiffon beige.

now my hair looks more natural colour. hehe

tomorrow is our last day of the fasting month, which i aimed to fast the whole day. hehe

and, hari raya will be coming really really soon.

looking forward for the $$$ to be collected. haha

wanting to rebond my hair tomorrow !!

i want to make my hair done badly, before hari raya.

boohooo~

P.S: 1 MORE MONTH TO MY BIG DAY !

greeeennnnn ! ♥

2010-09-08T00:54:00.006+08:00

just came back from geylang with random people, Fadzel and girlfriend; Deena.

nurul joined us too. hehe

unfortunately, suzi and sharifah couldn't join us.

and so, accompany nurul bought her raya clothings which is so nice.

envy her clothes ! hehe

glad she's happy with her clothes. :)

then met fadzel and deena, and we started surveying for fadzel's clothes.

took about 2 hours just to find his clothes.

the clothes that he bought was at final resort.

went everywhere to search for the green clothes, but the sizes are not available. haha

we then took cab to hometown to have our dinner.

after dinner, went home straight.

fun and enjoying outing, yet very tiring !

pfft.

tomorrow's having my HFT practical test.

i knew nothing is in my brain.

but i hope i could do it smoothly, just like my previous test which i learn nothing.

maybe not pass with flying colours, but to atleast just pass will do.

*winks*

hari raya is in a couple days time.

i am so not prepared !

not in the mood of celebrating.

but in the mood of partying. haha

cant wait to end my final exam on 13 sept, and there goes my holiday again !

anyway, found this at long lost love; Ash's nick name/ personal message at MSN.

ASHDEV; "NURAUDHA, I LOVE YOU."

im speechless.

P.S: LOVE ME AND MAKE IT REAL AND TRUE.

sicko ! ♥

2010-09-06T23:19:00.004+08:00

one freaking scary incident happen just now !

was walking with sharifah along a dark alley, walking pass this little small boy.

he looked at me and asked, CAN I FUCK YOU ??

i was so shocked that i thought i heard it wrongly.

so i said HUH???

then he was like smiling and touching his **** !

i was like wtf ????

i was so scared that i almost cried.

im like so traumatize.

he was like not even primary 5 u know !

ok, and thats crazy !

i swear he freak me out !

pfft.

anyway, i enjoyed my day with sharifah today.

the pokka game we played just now was really fun and cheered us up ! haha

thanks cibb, u're my "TRUE FRIEND" . haha

unfortunately im not ur " TRUE FRIEND ". hahaha !

♠♥♣♦

P.S: U JUST DON'T CARE !

shopping ! ♥

2010-09-06T01:02:00.004+08:00

just came back from shopping with babes.
unfortunately cibb ditch us today. haha
went to far east with suzi.
nurul met us there.
thought of rebonding my hair, but i am still confused. haha
instead, i use that money to shop for my beg and shoes ! haha
we break fast at Sakura.
shockingly, we spend $95 for 3 pax. haha!
that was a super blast !~
although our stomachs are too full to carry about, we continued to shop ! haha
spend my $$ just like that !
i love shopping with my babes !
tuesday going to geylang, and wednesday going to town again to shop !
hari raya, pls come soon, i need $$$ badly.
*winks*
anyway, tomorrow's exam day.
everyone is panicking about exams, but here i am still not studying.
guess im dead for tomorrow's exam.
pfft.
not forgetting, my long lost love; Ash did something surprising !
he put at his MSN personal message; MISSING NURAUDHA...
omg i swear i am so touch !

ME: *nudge*
ASH: heyys!
ME: hye!
ASH: how r u?
ME: fine tnkieu.
ASH: great..
ME: nick ???
ASH: i miss u.. but u tk miss me..
ME: haha, wow!
ASH: u busy ker? lambat reply? i gtg.. beep me soon ok? i miss u, tkcre, muahcks
ME: ok bye.

haha i knew it was me ! hehe
*melts*
ohs anyway, again, love is coming when i started leaving.
i swear its sucks.

P.S: LEAVE OR NOT ?

novel ♥

2010-09-05T01:29:00.002+08:00

been out of mood this few days.

rottening at home since i got a lot to do at home.

besides that, been reading this malay novel; CUMA DIA.

sister borrowed it from the library for me.

thats so lovely of her.

i love reading malay novel.

its been such a long time since i last read.

now when i've start reading it back, i cant even stop.

finishing the novel soon.

took me about 3 days ?

i think 3 days is considered long. haha

cant wait to proceed to the next novel.

thank you sis.

so, what has make me turn out of mood ?

only god knows whats on my mind.

anyway, did i tell u that im on 2 days of MC ??

hell yeah.

so, last week, i only went to school on Monday ? haha

thats great.

told ya i hate school.

pfft.

raya is coming soon, and i really dont feel like celebrating.

:):)

cant wait to meet my babes today.

going to shop for our stuffs !~

woohooo!

anyway, should i perm my hair?

or should i just rebond it?

most of them told me to perm.

but i think my hair is too short for a nice perm.

does that mean i have to rebond again ???

for the countless time ?? haha

boriinnnnngggg ~

i miss dearest.

and im leaving love.

for good i guess?

pfft.

in a state of confusion.

P.S: WHY MUST I LET U STAY WHEN U ARE JUST AN OPTION TO ME ?

the way he is ♥

2010-09-01T23:45:00.002+08:00

each time i met him, my love for him would grow stronger and stronger.

i knew its impossible for us to be part.

i tried not to put on high hopes.

but whenever he looks me in the eyes, my heart start pumping harder.

i love the way he look me in the eyes.

i love the way he smiled.

i love the way he laughed.

i love the way he's mad.

i love the way he sulk.

i love the way he hold me.

i love the way he stroke my hair.

i love the way he hugged me.

i love the way he kissed me.

i love the way he talked.

i love the way he sing.

i love the way he walked.

i love the way he sit.

i love the way he act.

i love the way he pampered me.

i love his nonsensical behavior.

i love his weird character.

and i just love the way he is !

dearest never fails to make me happy.

thats why i love him. haha

if only love knows whats going on now.

P.S: I CANT HELP BUT WAIT.

my love triangle ♥

2010-09-01T16:18:00.002+08:00

just posted about dearest, and here he is calling me. haha

omg i miss him alot !

he just finish working, and coming down to my place to see me !

weeheee !~

PANJANG UMOR KAU BIE ! kekeke

yeap, although im sick, nothing can stop me from meeting him. hehe !

my love ones never failed to make me happy.

thats why i love them alot.

im off to meet dearest !

tata

P.S: MY LOVE TRIANGLE.

teachers' day ! ♥

2010-09-01T15:43:00.003+08:00

back with my next post !~

just came back from meeting love.

atlast we finally met, after about a month.

absolutely i miss him so much.

but unfortunately, today i was not in the mood.

our meeting was not as great as usual due to my moodswing.

im sorry love.

not forgetting, dearest called me when i was with love.

panic + shock, i quickly keep my phone before love saw it.

pfft.

was sick since yesterday.

thats what cause my moodswing.

it started off with a flu.

then sinus, and leads to fever.

medicine is not working.

head is aching like shit.

hoping to get well really2 soon.

:):)

holiday just started on monday.

then now having two days of holiday due to teachers' day. haha

tomorrow back to schooling.

gonna have my test, which till now i haven't study. haha

i hate school, and i wanna quit !

P.S: TRUE LOVE ?

housekeeping ♥

2010-08-28T01:20:00.004+08:00

been lazy to post these days.
but i got no choice but to update.
my regular readers must be waiting for my next post. hehe
so, i left with another 2 weeks of fasting, and then hari raya will be coming up.
just bought my grey clothing just now.
credits to sharifah for accompanying me.
love that bitch so much.
ohs anyway, i've finish my redo make up test and i manage to pass.
proudly speaking, i did great.
thanks to sharifah for being my model.
that day i had to come back to school to make up for the missing hours.
managed to complete it anyway.
not forgetting, dearest came down to school for awhile just to see me.
thanks dear, appeciate it so much.
he's actually working around that area that moment. haha
he's so sweet, and i miss him super badly.
not forgetting, i miss love too.
gonna meet him next week, cant wait for it !
any more to post???
ohs not forgetting, after the make up hours, me and sharifah volunteered to do housekeeping for our spa.
took about 2 hours to finish everything. haha
i guess theres nothing more for me to post.
im now currently searching for a pair of heels and bag for my hari raya.
cant wait for tomorrow, cant wait for next sunday.
there u go!

P.S: MISSING THAT JERK AGAIN !

sempang bedok ♥

2010-08-23T01:27:00.005+08:00

didnt post for some time due to lazyness. haha
let me share a little about yesterday.
met my dearest ex as we planned to go geylang.
despite that, he decided to go sempang bedok to break our fast.
unfortunately, his brother and girlfriend tagg along.
was shocked and embarassed at the same time.
but i got no choice but to follow.
wanton noodle was freaking not nice !!
was scolded by him for not finishing the food.
JANGAN CKP TK ABES, TK LUAK PON! haha
after breaking fast, they decided to go geylang, but i insist of going home.
so, they send me off home.
thanks to his bro.
but instead of going home, went to meet fellow friends and slack.
today was supposed to meet him again for a movie.
but i ditch him.
ditch-ing people is part of me, so beware!
thats all for today.
ehhs wait !
tomorrow supposed to meet love.
but i guess his too busy to even beep me up? haha
good then.
can rest at home.
hoping dearest would call me up again.
please come down to meet me again during your 2hrs break !
miss u so bad.
ohs dear god, it has finally came.
thank you.
here goes my 7 days break from fasting. hehe
dont jealous ok?!

P.S: I WANT IT NO MORE.

$199 ♥

2010-08-20T18:35:00.002+08:00

yesterday's outing was ok.

couple of friends ditch us.

but the plan still goes on.

we break our fast at around 8pm due to crowd.

but overall, the crowd was still manageable as it was weekdays.

i love the black pepper chicken with rice.

i love the dendeng lembu chilli. hehe

ohs ya, about finding my grey clothes for my raya.

i found this goddamnnicegorgeousbeautifulawesome grey/silver suit which cost me $199.

damn its so expensive !

mummy, daddy, would u mind buying me that ??? plssss, hehe

hoping to go to Geylang again.

maybe this time on weekends ???

*winks*

P.S: COME SOON BABY.

geylang ♥

2010-08-19T15:08:00.002+08:00

one down, and still counting on days.

and so, today is the day I've been looking forward for.

going to Geylang with fellow old friends, weee !~

im craving for my dengdeng and kebab !

wooos~

hoping to see many people there.

at the same time, hoping to find a nice grey/silver clothes for myself.

hopes nothing cocks up and everyone enjoys ourself.

ohs and guess what ?!

last two days, dearest surprised me again.

Dear: *calling* Hello, b uat pe uhs?

Me: tido.

Dear: huh ??? i kt bwh sehh.

Me: ok.

Dear: ape ok?! trn uhs skrg!

Me: ok, mandi ulu.

there goes my story. haha

he came down to see me within his 2 hours break.

had no choice, but to wake up and bath, and meet him.

was so so so happy to see him.

misses him alot.

*winks*

he wanted to come down again to see me, but i refused.

again, i was sleeping.

sorry dear. :):)

tomorrow meeting love.

pfft.

not in the mood of seeing him.

P.S: SILENTLY WAITING.

ass ♥

2010-08-17T00:24:00.000+08:00

I MISS THAT ASS AND JERKS !~

P.S: COME BACK.

make up ♥

2010-08-15T18:17:00.004+08:00

now its been the fifth day im fasting.

and i am so proud of myself. hehe

YOG holiday is finally here.

i got two weeks to enjoy, wee !~

during fasting month, all i did is sleep at home the whole day.

only wakes up during breaking fast.

and off to meet bitches after that.

thats my routine for now.

*winks*

i got nothing to post actually.

ohs, not forgetting, i failed my make up test and has to re-do.

thanks to dearest classmate.

P.S: MEAN UR WORDS.

piggy ♥

2010-08-14T12:52:00.002+08:00

good afternoon readers !~

thought of posting last night, but i was too busy sleeping the whole day.

and i really mean the whole day.

reached home from school around 1 pm, sleep till 7 pm when its time to break fast.

after breaking fast, continue sleeping till 5 am.

sleep again till 12 pm. haha

fasting month is a piggy month for me. hehe

and so, today is the 4th day of the fasting month.

been doing great and i am really proud of myself.

hoping to fast all the way without fail.

is it possible ???

i hope so.

cant wait to break fast with my babes soon.

annddd geylang, wait for me !~

im coming really really soon.

*winks*

missing love and dearest badly.

unfortunately its fasting month, hehe !~

hope to meet them really really soon.

lovelovelove.

P.S: WELL DONE.

fasting ♥

2010-08-11T19:03:00.002+08:00

didnt went to school today as i was having diarrhea again !~

thought of going polyclinic to take MC, but i was too lazy.

met Sharifah in the afternoon.

and now im back home.

cant wait to break my fast later !~

i am so happy that i managed to fast for the first day.

hopefully, it will last for the whole month.

amin.

*winks*

P.S: GIVE ME THE STRENGTH.

national day ! ~ ♥

2010-08-10T20:33:00.003+08:00

national day was so boring.

went out with babes and met friends there.

it was packed; nothing new.

the worst part is there is no reception / network.

catch the beautiful fireworks at clark quay which is so boring.

but it was ok.

proceed to pasir ris to slack and taunt till early morning, around 6 am.

fun fun fun.

ohs, not forgetting, there's an incident when i was walking to the city hall control station, a big heavy wooden thing fell on my leg.

i swear it was super painful.

luckily the glass didnt poke into my skin.

leg was swollen till now.

today had a make up test at 10 am.

but unfortunately i didnt went to school as my leg was super painful and swollen that i couldnt walk.

at the same time i couldnt wake up, since i am so sleepy. hehe

decided to take MC in the afternoon, and proceed to have our lunch.

thats all for today.

before i end this, i wanna wish all the muslim people, SELAMAT BERPUASE / HAPPY FASTING.

SEMOGA IMAN KUAT YERR KAWAN-KAWAN.

KALAU BOLEH PUASE FULL.

wondering how am i going to survive during the fasting month.

ok go !~

P.S: SURVIVED

happy national day ! ~ ♥

2010-08-09T04:03:00.003+08:00

YOG is nonsense today !~

was wondering why students has to seat on the floor, while the outsiders can seat on the bench.

damn packed, that our legs were all aching.

the goodies bag was o.k

what i enjoyed most is to get to see our Senior Minister. haha

kay i know lame.

i love the performance, especially the taiwan cheerleading, capoeira, and etc.

ohs not forgetting, we had to report at 3.30pm.

but we only manage to get in at 5.30 pm

how pathetic it is !~

the weather is so freaking hot, and the security is so freaking irritating.

everyone almost blew up !~ haha

especially sharifah.

ends at 8 pm, and off to meet nurul.

ate so much sushi, burp !~

reached home around 3 am in the morning. haha

i know its late, but i enjoyed.

wait, i almost forgot.

HAPPY 45TH BIRTHDAY SINGAPORE !~

k done. haha

still wondering where should i catch the fireworks with babes tonight ?

i want to go padang !!

got my husband performing, TAUFIK BATISAH !!!!! haha

trust me, i love him.

P.S: WHEN YOUR GONE.

awesome ♥

2010-08-07T15:16:00.006+08:00

hello suckers!

after so long, im back with my next post. haha

been busy with school, projects, assignments and not forgetting busy with socialising. haha

i just went home from meeting love today.

had a great day with him.

thanks dear for the day.

yesterday went out with ".

went to have our lunch at west coast.

then went to labador park.

and off to vivo to catch a movie; SALT.

was great, but the ending sucks.

then, off to mount faber.

and suppose to have our dinner after that, but i was too tired.

so decided to go home.

almost had an accident last night.

thanks to him for his clumsiness with his bike.

fortunately im safe.

thank god.

thanks for the day.

enjoyed, and confused.

pfft.

that day went to meet my first ex.

*winks*

his look didnt change at all.

its been after so long, about 5 to 6 years of not meeting him after our breakup. haha

well, i admit he changed a lot.

his stupid beautiful bike had cause a bruise on my leg ! haha

am i like chasing all the bikers or what?!

ohs come on !~ haha

thats all for today.

eh wait !~

tomorrow is sunday right?

so it means no school right?

only crazy people go to school on sunday !~ haha

stupid YOG !

P.S: I GET DISGUSTED ~

dear god ♥

2010-08-03T02:34:00.002+08:00

it just feels so sucks when everything goes wrong.

am so freaking stressed right now.

just feel like crying, but these tears just wont appear.

i wonder what will happen next.

it happens all in one go, and its too difficult for me to handle.

dear god, give me the strength to go through all these.

i am too weak and tired of all this obstacles.

may u stop all this karma and revenge that is happening to me, please.

P.S: I LOVE U BOY, YES U, NOT HIM !~

u choose ur steps ♥

2010-07-31T15:06:00.006+08:00

hey fellow readers!~
im back from meeting love.
thank you love for the wonderful day.
although its hard for us to meet, but u would always give me these huge n fantastic awesome meet ups each session. hehe
thank you and hope to meet up again, i guess? hehe
so, love send me off to meet sharifah, to take back my stuffs, and off im home.
call up quite a number of people to meet up, but they were too busy whenever im free.
nothing new, im not surprised.
im so bored, feeling so sick. :(:(

P.S: WHY DO U EVEN CHOOSE TO GO ?

never come back ! ~ ♥

2010-07-31T00:32:00.002+08:00

i am so full of energy today.

fully charged after school, till i woke up almost 8 pm.

didnt mean to ditch friends, but i was overslept.

im sorry suzi and asy'ari, especially maznah.

pfft.

today is the day.

always taking the chance of playing computer till early morning.

since brother is working night shift lohs !~ hehe

tomorrow morning meeting love.

wondering how should i go out if my wallet and every important things is with babe.

these are the consequences of putting stuffs in people's bag.

cause u will intend to forget. hehe

thats all for tonight.

i shall give another post tonight if im really bored. hehe

P.S: NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER COME BACK !~

happy birthday nashrah ! ~ ♥

2010-07-29T18:34:00.003+08:00

just reached home from school.

today was a long freaking day.

and again, i survived throughout the whole day.

phew!~

didnt have time to post yesterday as i was busy. haha

and finally, me and friends are done with our CMS group project.

now im finally left with my phase test which is tomorrow.

and CMS individual powerpoint project.

cant wait to end everything soon.

and, not forgetting to wish nashrah happy 18th legal birthday !~ hehe

anyway, i have been planning about this year's national day.

weehee !~

really cant wait.

wondering who would i go with this year.

wroooommmm !~

miss love, dearest and him !

*winks*

P.S: UR BEING SO TROUBLESOME !~

doomsday ♥

2010-07-28T00:58:00.003+08:00

hey hey hey im back!

met sharifah at around 7pm, and slack with her until 11pm.

had a great great talk with her.

DO U GUYS EVEN BELIEVE THAT 21/12/2012 IS THE DOOMSDAY ?

i swear its hard for me to believe. haha

been talking with her about that the whole night.

and we swear we're super scared of it. haha

anyone not scared of it ???

fuck off !~

cant wait to go school tomorrow.

seeing bitch tomorrow.

she's coming to my school as she got event. haha

i miss her i miss her i miss her.

P.S: DOOMSDAY ?!

super 4 is love ! ~ ♥

2010-07-27T16:41:00.004+08:00

just went home from school.

supposed to end at 1pm today, but went to have our lunch after school.

school was slack today as i wasnt the therapist.

today is phase test, but luckily its not my turn.

friday is my turn i guess?

my therapist, Fai was super good that i fall asleep while she was doing treatment for me.

life is getting boring and more boring.

last night went to meet Apul.

i super fall in love with his super big bike, SUPER 4 !~ haha

i would also wanna thank nurul for accompanying me from 9pm to 1 am, waiting for Apul.

much much appreciation, lots of love.

get well soon bitch!~

and so, Apul sent me off under my void deck in the morning.

thought of going school straight, but i got to know that school start late today.

haha but the moment i got that information, i was all ready for school with make ups on. haha

semangat nak sekolah nampak !~

so, decided to give a short nap.

woke up at 9am and rushed to school.

enjoyed myself last night.

hoping to meet him again soon.

not forgetting his SUPER 4 too !~ haha

and so, im waiting for sharifah to beep me up.

meeting her later around 6+ or 7 ? haha

ok thats all for now.

P.S: I MISS MY DEAREST.

aromatherapy ♥

2010-07-26T16:36:00.002+08:00

just reached home from school.

today practical lesson, learnt about AROMATHERAPY. haha

isnt it great ?!

dont jealous ok ? haha

u'll get free treatment by me soon ok? haha

school was slack today and im glad i survived throughout the whole day.

saw him in school today, and it really spoil my day.

as usual, im bored at home, nothing to do.

bitch is always busy working and never had time for me.

my second bitch is always busy with school and work.

pfft.

waiting for someone to ask me out. haha

P.S: LEAVE AND NEVER COME BACK.

i want my used-to-be-weekends ♥

2010-07-25T21:38:00.004+08:00

i hate my sundays !

always had no plan and had to stay at home.

was supposed to meet HIM today at 12pm, but i ditch him.

cause i woke up at 2pm.

wondering why he ask my sister to wake me up, when he can call me himself.

pfft.

then, around 4pm, he told me to come down to kallang.

he got soccer match with his friends.

i was late, and he ditch me!

he said he's tired, asshole!~

i blew him off, and then he told me to meet him at 8pm.

so, its my turn to ditch him back!~ haha

and today, the 2nd person whom i ditch is Jack. haha

sorry dear, but im glad u break our deal !~

say no no to 1 year! hehe

around 8pm, went to Watsons with sister to buy my make up.

and i swear i hate make ups.

i spent about $40 just for foundation, eyebrow pencil and mascara !

damn, thats crazy !~

then i had to fock out another $25 for my prepaid card. haha

but well, i still love using prepaid and i am still excited about it.

after so long i never said PREPAID LOW. hahaha

cooool~

still had to fock out $20 soon for my powder.

tsk tsk !

my $300 bill is still waiting. haha~

tomorrow's monday.

school, school, school. haiz

P.S: I NEED JOB.

welcome ♥

2010-07-25T02:45:00.003+08:00

took hours to re-organize my blog.

find new blogskins, and have to edit here and there.

well, it still in pink !~ haha

i am happy with my new blog ! haha

maybe now i have to start uploading pictures in every post???

i doubt so.

P.S: SHAGGED.

imma bike lover ♥

2010-07-24T23:10:00.009+08:00

hello readers!~

just got home.

met a random guy just now.

im so love with his smell and im so in love with his bike. hehe

he was nice though.

thanks for making my day.

in the evening meet my lovely friends, maznah, asy'ari and bitches.

went to pasar malam to eat !~ haha

have a very very very nice and interesting conversation. hehe

misses them so much!

*winks*

tomorrow have to meet HIM to talk things out.

been having conflicts since our breakup.

not wanting to ditch HIM, but i hope he cancel's tomorrows meetup.

i am so not ready to meet HIM.

pfft.

out tomorrow anyone ???

P.S: BIKE LOVERS !~

slow down bitch ! ~ ♥

2010-07-24T11:16:00.005+08:00

hello and good morning !~

love woke me up at 8.30 am today as i have to meet him.

was feeling so lazy and no mood to meet him today.

so yeah, i ditch him.

sorry love.

had no plan today, waiting for someone to ask me out.

*winks*

as usual, weekend is such a bore !~

miss my old weekend which i used to spent with her.

boohoo.

P.S: I SHALL STOP CHASING.

say that you want me ♥

2010-07-24T00:08:00.004+08:00

hello suckers!

today is the first day in the week i woke up early for school.

thanks to sharifah.

was late for school as i was having my diarrhea again.

ohs well, its my same old routine each day. haha

theory class was cancelled and its such a sickening.

waste my time come to school !~

went home and sleep, until i forgotten that i have plans with someone.

sorry dear.

anyway, my handphone line has been cut.

2 months never pay bill. haha

only 2 months what ?!

whatever larghs singtel !

pfft.

with my non working sim card, couldnt switch on my phone.

so, i couldnt search for any contacts due to saving it all in simcard.

so please do take note about that.

my night was great. haha

thanks bitch!~

tomorrow meeting love in the morning.

damn, im run out of make ups.

and i really mean run out !

how can i even meet him without make up ?!

sucks.

no need meet love can?

*winks*

i miss dearest badly, although ive met him yesterday. haha

poor him, must be tired of working. haha

like real la u dear !

P.S: BE MINE, I WANT YOU, YES YOU, DEAREST !~